You know that feeling (referring to all single ladies out there), when you found some girls who just SSI like you ( Smart, sexy, and Interesting) you knew that you are not alone in this world. As i realized, most of my posts are now referring to personal thing and becoming in too deep. Well, i should read more motivational and business books, though, in order to make useful posting. Whatever.Back to the topic, It is hard for us ( of course not only me) the border line girls who happened to be single, available with good career but seems hard to the find the right man.
Like in my case, people think that i am struggling to move on, fact is NO! i am moving on, peeps! I really live my life, do whatever i supposed to do with NO LIMITS and BOUNDARIES ( Except my Dad that is still calling ; where are you? I am sleepy so get back home, take your own key) -_- I am grown up, Dad. Furthermore, it is so nice to hang out with your colleagues, girlfriends, new friends, and old friends, we laugh, we share, we eat and drink which remind us that we are alive, however i honestly saying that whenever i get back into the room, i still feel empty, it's like there is a hole inside but i cannot tell it why ( those girls feel the same too), and for a God sake, social media is toxic. It is because we hope for the things that God will give it to us when the time is right, but we are just tidak sabar and feel disgraceful about it, you know what i mean.
|My Dad was letting me to have fun, though he was complaining that i need to bring my own spare key|
|i was blind all these time|
I don't want to sound like desperate, but i think i started liking my life now, well if we mentioned my massive breakup, i might say it is not making me any better, but it is getting easier to bear. Well, it is a common thing in life, people come and go, then you will start to love again, meet the right person, it is completely normal, the thing that LONELINESS is often coming within unexpected time, for instance ; when you just arrived from work, woke up in the morning and during "tanggal tua" ( why it is related, because it means you will just stay at home and doing nothing). Speaking of which, i try to not be trapped in the situation, that is why i signed up for gym, went out with my friends almost every weekend, and even laugh as much as i can, but still the hole is there, and i haven't found what i wanted.
Fortunately, i am not alone. there a bunch of SSI girls feel the same way, but from what i saw they're not giving up. They still focus on work, career and even work on their bodies.UUUUUU ~ this is the fun part actually, you might be old but you're hot. The point is , i can't mourn my loneliness forever. Yes i date with several guys and ended up being " HE'S JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU" thing, and i watch several my crushes are getting married ( yes, that's hurt a little bit but i am so happy for them), it quite makes me blue. Should i show that feelings on social media? NAAH...
So now, what else i can do? Absolutely nothing. Except those irritated people who happen braniac talked about politics and feminism, they should be scolded , because it's good for your health (kidding) - Read "Black sheep, The benefits of Being Bad" by Richard Stephens.
I am writing this with the ups and downs emotions, along the writing i found something sucks, you can see i am upset and happy at the same time, but never mind.
In a nut shell, when you stop wishing, it is coming naturally like you will never expected before. so i should stop hoping but it doesn't have to make me stop dreaming. Because at the end of the day, you will understand that it is worth to be waited and due to that, you will be more appreciate what God has given to you.
HASTA LA VISTA
|and doing solo travelling was actually fun, you just need extra battery to keep updating your stories |